Paper or Plastic?

Paper or plastic? I think the answer should be 7 paper and the rest plastic.

Full disclosure my uncle owned a plastics factory and my mom lives on a tree farm. She showed us this trick. The trash can is a huge source of disease. Reutilizing consumer packaging is the right thing to do. Using one paper bag and 1 plastic bag you can make a disposable trash can. Now this won't replace your kitchen trash can or any other heavily used refuse container but it does serve well.
Equipment: one paper and one plastic bag.

Step 1:  Roll the edges of the paper bag until they are the same height of the plastic bag.

Step 2: Line the paper bag with plastic bag and you have a disposable trash can.

When full or contaminated simply dispose as you normally do.
Next time I will utilize a gray bag so the photo shows up better.
Mom's blog http://www.rociofloresmoss.blog.com/

Thanks to my dental team

The wonderful people at my dentist office gave me a card and a care package. I also got a couple of really good hugs. Thank you so very much.

Round three perspectives

I look forward to recovery.

The cumulative effects of the poison are painful. I feel like I am on a long march. We are managing a secondary infection. Which means we added doxycyclene. This just adds to the side effects of dry mouth upset stomach and sun sensitivity. I am a vampire. The sun makes me break out in a rash. My wife is an awesome caregiver. We have learned to mitigate the effects of the daily pills. About 3 hours after taking a lapatinib I take a shower followed by a oatmeal bath followed by a Eucerin rub down. During the bath I am noshing on trail mix Gatorade and water.

Military skills have helped me. Patience standing in line in order to get poison or something that I didn't really want. Since my imune system is taxed survival skills specifically nuclear, biological, and chemical training are helpful. Awareness of vectors for disease and how to compensate. Treating chemicals like they are hazardous to me. Moving about in the shadows order to stay away from radiation emitted by the sun. Long range patrol techniques. Nutrition, sanitation, and hygiene skills. Acknowledging and relishing in the fact that the last easy day is today.

Chemo Brian is the negative mental effects of chemotherapy. Lack of focus much, like hangover. Forgetfulness. I used to think that I didn't know where I left my beer because I was drunk. I thought it was Alzheimer's but I realize it its just sometimerz. It could be CRS (Can't remember stuff.)

Perspective. I am in a little pain. I have access to the best doctors and the best medicine in the world. My military service provided me with medical coverage that is quite reasonable. I have an incredible crew lead by an awesome godly woman. I have tonsil cancer diagnosed in a relatively early stage. I have people praying for me all around the world. I am blessed.

I like being home with the love of my life.

Met with my surgical oncologist. Happy with the progress on the tumor scheduled for surgery August 5th
　

Club member in need

As I was shuffling to the bathroom with my IV chemo drugs I bumped into another club member, Sheri Thomas. The outpouring of support for me has been awesome. Since she is more sensitive to privacy concerns than I; she doesn't have a blog, global emails or anything else announcing to the world that she has cancer. If you would like to help let her know. 

Inspirational words‏

In the interconnected virtual world we live in we can almost hear each others think:-)

 Thank God for all the people thinking of me and praying for me.

If my words have brought joy and inspiration to anyone I am delighted.

It is becuase I am an inspired man. I am a joyous man.

Inspired by the Living God.

Joyous of the love He has
for me...for you..for all of us.  We can all shout "He Loves Me!"

Don't waste your cancer . Many times I have thought  "If we can live through this will be a good story."  So far, I have several good stories. 

As you are rolled in the surf know you are in his hands and He loves you.  If you die you get to be with Him.  Awesome.

Don't waste a breath

You shouldn't waste the experience of cancer or any experince life hands you. When you are in a spin,  or on fire, or underwater with no air being tossed to and fro in the waves, or jumping out airplanes and blowing things up. Taste all that the experience has to offer without forgeting that you have the rest of your life to perform your emergency actions...that may only be a few seconds. Who ya!

  Life is meant to relish and embrace.

 One should not miss out on the religious experiences of life.  I spent much of my life engaging in somewhat hazardous activities that required focused concentration.  Living in the moment has been described as Zen. 

I am in some pain. I have a lot of drugs going through my system. This is vivid experience.  You only really get to know someone when you get to see them sweat or bleed.  I am getting to know myself better.

I have been dictating to my tablet . I imagine that Google is perfecting the voice recognition of me to sell to me. That thing is from God.  Reflections of man's brilliance reflect God's brilliance becuase we are made in His image.  How we use those gifts is often up to us.
 

Funny as cancer‏

Round two. My good friend gave me a ride in her awesome sports car. We spent all day at the hospital. The affects are cumulative. The reason why they want to limit heavy metals is they are poison if ingested. They keep the cells from: repairing feeding and or replicating. Eucerin is an ointment that helps the skin heal. It is white in color.  My daughter call it my war paint. I think when my face is covered in white that I look like a clown. Fortunately my experience as a jester and fool lets me feel right at home. Some of these fun side effects include acne . It seems like you can feel it come out. It feels like fire ants.
  We were on an exercise in Panama. low crawling towards the objective . When all of a sudden a man went running by ripping his clothes off. One of our teammates low crawled into a pile of fire ants. It was funny but he was in great pain. The war paint makes it less painful and repairs your skin.
  It seems as if the chemo side effects are like someone took meth and removed the getting high part and just kept the physical side effects. I was thinking it would be a great advertising program to advertise cleaning products as in doors by message takes all over say vacuum cleaners toothbrushes or things like that.

You named your tumor?

 People that know me know I am weird.  I named my cancer filled lymph node limpoolio.  I don't have empirical data to back up my theory that externalizing and objectifying your enemy will help you defeat it. It will help me but I am strange.

I have three swollen lymph nodes, limpoolio and two more.  bu du bump.

My children had fun during adolescence ragging on each other...http://tinyurl.com/cqmr8xx

The long run or perspectives on round one

It might be premature to comment on round one since I have 2000 mg of Lapatinib and 39 hours and 58 minutes between me and round two in the chair, but who is counting?  The pain is tolerable; inconvenient and consuming but not impossible to deal with.  They gave me some pain medications and I know I can get the safety boat to pull me out if needed.  The idea of relief is comforting. 
  I have awesome friends and a family sent straight from God. 

We were all sent here to help, inspire, and love on each other.  Fitz ran a marathon and dedicated it to me.  A two fold tale.  He inspires me to recall that I have endured trails before and this won't be a sprint.  He can inspire others to put their challenges in perspective.  The wrong kind of milk in your latte' may inspire wrath for the barista but it is your glory to give grace.  We all have good days and bad days.  Think about your bad days and how uplifting it is if an unexpected person gives you a word of encouragement.  "Run Ronney, run!" was hollered at me many times over the years.  During cross country and track in high school, in the military and at multiple races around the world…Some of the voices I recognize like my wife and my mother but others are just people who helped me mentally.  (There were often special words in the military, some not even English ;) 

Fitz and friends last December

  It is with great sadness that I read of the death of a young combat controller, Captain Neil Landsberg http://tinyurl.com/cekde2k 

It puts all my tiny problems into perspective.  Take care of each other.

Chemical warfare in my veins

Chemo sucks

My mom and I watched “Bucket List” last night.  I have tried to fill my bucket everyday.  Leap from an airplane 25,000 feet above the earth, SCUBA dive 130 feet under the water, riding motorcycles, shooting guns and blowing things up.  These are things I did before I was twenty five.  I get to kiss the most beautiful woman in the world daily.  I still have things I would like to do but, I have been blessed to cram a whole lot of living into my life so far.  My pop told me when I turned twenty-five “I did not think you would survive to this age.”  Cancer is not how I want to die…I do not want to slip quietly to sleep. 

The joke is: I want to die like my grandpa, sweetly sleeping and not like all his passengers. 

I want to slide into the grave full throttle throwing rooster tails of dirt laughing maniacally “Who-ya, what a ride!” 

            I'm glad that my chemo does not feel as bad as the scenes in the movie.  My truth is beginning to get real.  I am not sure if it is the effects of the IV four days later or the effects ten hours after 1000 mg of Lapatinib, or the cumulative effects of all of the above.  Interfering with the cells ability to replicate and repair is the point of these drugs.  Limpoolio is being directly targeted.  I feel kind of like I went on a long hard road march or two days after a marathon.  This is the first time I have felt that I could not ride my motorcycle safely.  Not really the riding part…just the putting your feet down and holding the bike up part…which is important. 

 

            We are sustained by prayer.  Thank God for today.  I am glad to be on the journey because that means I am closer to the finish line. 

           

            http://tinyurl.com/d289fl

Very informative video for my type of cancer

One of the inspirational survivors sent me this video outlining the type of cancer I have.  He is five years cancer free.  He also gave me good advice that emphasizes what I have been told.  Take good care of your mouth to avoid a lot of pain and long term side effects. 
http://tinyurl.com/d8amvya

The first day in the chair

  Yesterday I rode the chemo chair for the first time.  It was fatiguing but not painful.  I was in the chair for about four hours.  The chair is a functional but comfortable recliner.  One side of the cubical has a machine to monitor your vitals and the other side has a fancy IV stand that meters the drugs into your veins.  They have wifi, a TV and a cubby hole for your books and stuff.  My wife and mom took turns accompanying me.  I am very lucky to have such caring caregivers. 

I try to stay away from drugs.  We as a society medicate symptoms rather than address the underlying cause.  Just one example is the use of pain medications.  In my former career as a special operation paratrooper one would get injured; perhaps a sprained ankle.  Being a tough guy just use a little bit of speed tape and a few Motrin to mask the pain and allow mission completion.  Once back from the operation hobble around the shop and lay off PT and in hopes that it would heal.  The joint and surrounding tissues would be weak from a lack of real rest which is required for true healing.  The next very important mission would come around and the cycle would repeat until one day the compromised pieces parts would fail and make it so the tough guy could not walk, much less complete the mission.  So I try hard to avoid medications that just allow me to drive on, I still drive on just no pain meds…this means it hurts when I do a particular motion…so I don't do that motion. I watched a bunch of really good operators medically retire because they ate “ranger candy” and toughed it out until the body caved.  I compromised my long term health because I was an idiot in many ways, and needless pride filled “cowboy up” episodes were but one of the methods of self destruction…

Anyway now I am a chemical cocktail.  I took three types of preventative medications almost as soon as I sat down; Benadryl, decadron, and zofran.  The stick was no drama and soon I was receiving a saline solution to flush my veins.  The first drug may have scary side effects including something similar to anaphylactic shock.  To minimize the risk of making cancer a moot point the nurse started a very slow drip and monitored my vitals.  After several stepped increasing the flow and remaining non-reactive we were able to go full bore.  I suppose the advertisement would be if it does not kill you in the first fifteen minutes it is a great treatment.  Since I am not allergic to the drug next time we do not have to do the stepped approach.  The first drug was Carboplatin: heavy metal platinum interferes with mitosis.  One theory is that it works like cisplatin by binding stronger than guanine, one of the building blocks of DNA. Heavy metal chemo <http://tinyurl.com/colpp2z>

After a flush of the IV we started on the second drug.  I was able to fool around on my tablet, watch you tube videos and check email.  The second drug was Paclitaxel: a cytoskeletal creates defects in mitotic spindle assembly, chromosome segregation, and cell division. It keeps the microtubules from disassembly and thus keeps the cell from completing mitosis.  Originally derived from Yew tree bark…funny that the alternate medicine folks that complain that medicines from nature are ignored fought this cure to “save the trees”… Cytoskeletal was that a He-man character?  I think of the Aflac duck every time I say Paclitaxel.  

I watched a video that was slamming the cancer industry.  Some points are valid.  Big pharma, big medicine, big insurance, and the lawsuit industry are driven by profit.  Western medicine tends to tackle the symptom rather than address many underlying lifestyle root causes.  You are depressed because you live an unhealthy lifestyle and do bad things all the time…here is a pill.  You can not sleep because you ingest stimulants all day and/or you conscious bothers you…here have a pill.  Your penis is not functioning because your body is falling apart and you receive very little stimulus from your partners…have a pill.  But as a species we are living longer, healthier, wealthier lives and a lot of the credit goes to advances in medicine.  <http://tinyurl.com/bngnnbk>

Steve Jobs is the non-example of the effectiveness of alternate medicine.  A friend of mine asks “do you know what they call medicine verified by multiple double blind studies?”  Medicine…bad um bump

The weather was stormy cold and rainy when we left.  It was almost as if the director was working the mood-o-meter.  When we finished the skies opened up and a gorgeous Spring day emerged.  My wife drove back and that was a good thing.  I was very tired and drifted off to sleep a few times.  I have to take a 1000mg of Lapatinib everyday.  Lapatinib has a long track record with breast cancer…it is a dual tyrosine kinase inhibitor which means it interferes with the production of many proteins by interfering with the signals that cause the cell to produce and regulate many proteins essential for cell growth.  They gave me some anti-nausea pills with the instructions to take it at the first sign.  I woke up about four hours after taking the first dose feeling a little queasy.  The other symptoms so far are fatigue, a slight reddness, some itchiness and I am more sensitive to smells.  The conflicting side-effects of diarrhea and constipation seem to be minimal and I am thankful. 

I am very thankful that God has blessed me with so many AWESOME friends and an extremely supportive family.  I am very thankful for my healthcare team.  First round, not bad…I can not tell any changes in Limpoolio either size, mood or consistency

The first day in the chair

  Yesterday I rode the chemo chair for the first time.  It was fatiguing but not painful.  I was in the chair for about four hours.  The chair is a functional but comfortable recliner.  One side of the cubical has a machine to monitor your vitals and the other side has a fancy IV stand that meters the drugs into your veins.  They have wifi, a TV and a cubby hole for your books and stuff.  My wife and mom took turns accompanying me.  I am very lucky to have such caring caregivers. 

I try to stay away from drugs.  We as a society medicate symptoms rather than address the underlying cause.  Just one example is the use of pain medications.  In my former career as a special operation paratrooper one would get injured; perhaps a sprained ankle.  Being a tough guy just use a little bit of speed tape and a few Motrin to mask the pain and allow mission completion.  Once back from the operation hobble around the shop and lay off PT and in hopes that it would heal.  The joint and surrounding tissues would be weak from a lack of real rest which is required for true healing.  The next very important mission would come around and the cycle would repeat until one day the compromised pieces parts would fail and make it so the tough guy could not walk, much less complete the mission.  So I try hard to avoid medications that just allow me to drive on, I still drive on just no pain meds…this means it hurts when I do a particular motion…so I don’t do that motion. I watched a bunch of really good operators medically retire because they ate “ranger candy” and toughed it out until the body caved.  I compromised my long term health because I was an idiot in many ways, and needless pride filled “cowboy up” episodes were but one of the methods of self destruction…

Anyway now I am a chemical cocktail.  I took three types of preventative medications almost as soon as I sat down; Benadryl, decadron, and zofran.  The stick was no drama and soon I was receiving a saline solution to flush my veins.  The first drug may have scary side effects including something similar to anaphylactic shock.  To minimize the risk of making cancer a moot point the nurse started a very slow drip and monitored my vitals.  After several stepped increasing the flow and remaining non-reactive we were able to go full bore.  I suppose the advertisement would be if it does not kill you in the first fifteen minutes it is a great treatment.  Since I am not allergic to the drug next time we do not have to do the stepped approach.  The first drug was Carboplatin: heavy metal platinum interferes with mitosis.  One theory is that it works like cisplatin by binding stronger than guanine, one of the building blocks of DNA. Heavy metal chemo http://tinyurl.com/colpp2z

After a flush of the IV we started on the second drug.  I was able to fool around on my tablet, watch you tube videos and check email.  The second drug was Paclitaxel: a cytoskeletal creates defects in mitotic spindle assembly, chromosome segregation, and cell division. It keeps the microtubules from disassembly and thus keeps the cell from completing mitosis.  Originally derived from Yew tree bark…funny that the alternate medicine folks that complain that medicines from nature are ignored fought this cure to “save the trees”… Cytoskeletal was that a He-man character?  I think of the Aflac duck every time I say Paclitaxel.   

I watched a video that was slamming the cancer industry.  Some points are valid.  Big pharma, big medicine, big insurance, and the lawsuit industry are driven by profit.  Western medicine tends to tackle the symptom rather than address many underlying lifestyle root causes.  You are depressed because you live an unhealthy lifestyle and do bad things all the time…here is a pill.  You can not sleep because you ingest stimulants all day and/or you conscious bothers you…here have a pill.  Your penis is not functioning because your body is falling apart and you receive very little stimulus from your partners…have a pill.  But as a species we are living longer, healthier, wealthier lives and a lot of the credit goes to advances in medicine.  http://tinyurl.com/bngnnbk

Steve Jobs is the non-example of the effectiveness of alternate medicine.  A friend of mine asks “do you know what they call medicine verified by multiple double blind studies?”  Medicine…bad um bump

The weather was stormy cold and rainy when we left.  It was almost as if the director was working the mood-o-meter.  When we finished the skies opened up and a gorgeous Spring day emerged.  My wife drove back and that was a good thing.  I was very tired and drifted off to sleep a few times.  I have to take a 1000mg of Lapatinib everyday.  Lapatinib has a long track record with breast cancer…it is a dual tyrosine kinase inhibitor which means it interferes with the production of many proteins by interfering with the signals that cause the cell to produce and regulate many proteins essential for cell growth.  They gave me some anti-nausea pills with the instructions to take it at the first sign.  I woke up about four hours after taking the first dose feeling a little queasy.  The other symptoms so far are fatigue, my face seems a little red, shortly after consumption of the Lapatinib I get a little itchy but it only lasted a little while,  and I am more sensitive to smells.  The conflicting side-effects of diarrhea and constipation seem to be minimal so far and I am thankful. 

I am very thankful that God has blessed me with so many AWESOME friends and an extremely supportive family.  I am very thankful for my talented healthcare team.  First round, not bad…I can not tell any changes in Limpoolio either in size or consistency

Fear of the unknown

   I told my mom I was not expecting a restful night and she asked me "when you did scary things in the military did you have trouble sleeping?"  I thought about it and remarked that I generally did sleep well because I had an illusion of control.  The training helped.  If we were going to scuba dive we had spent hours in the classroom, days in the pool rehearsing ad infinitum.  We might not have experienced visceral reality yet but had a pretty good idea of the sequence of events.  The same is true when I present stalls and spins to a pilot.  "What causes a stall?" "Excessive angle of attack…" "How do you recover?" "Reduce the angle of attack."  The first time they see a stall is a very controlled and gentle stall while we are coming back from a flight.  They have seen three or four demonstrated before they perform their first one and it is a generally very gentle experience.  I could (and did) present the academics on the ground which can translate to an overactive imagination that "we are going to make the plane stop flying and it may flip over into a spin!" 

  I was able to speak to one of the Imerman Angels www.imermanangels.org learned what to expect and received some sober advice from a cancer survivor.  He had essentially the same cancer a little over three years ago.  He let me know his experience with chemo, radiation and surgery.  Some scary things, the surgery had side effects that included loss of use of his left arm and neck...these were resolved after a few months of rehabilitation.  Some really good advice, he did not suffer much nausea the first two sessions of chemo but had severe indigestion the third time.  He waited until the next visit to alert his team.  They gave him some medicine and he experienced immediate relief.  Basically he had needless discomfort for a week.  I will be alert to let my team know.  The "pick up your kneecap and cowboy up" is not the way to approach the treatment.

  We were able to watch the aerobatic contest.  My wife drove, my mom rode shotgun and Ben and I rode in the back.  This is also therapy dog training.  We lounged in the grass and watched the pilots perform their routines.  I will be daydreaming of acro when I am in the chemo chair.  Ben is socializing well.  The aerobatic contests are a very family friendly environment.  Freaky people, "normal" people, grandparents, the grumpy old dude, moms, wives, husbands and kids were there.  Some of them were very friendly to him.  He was excitable and heavy with his responses at first but became gentle by the end of the day.  One of the little guys was very precocious.  He was petting him, examining his ears, nose and other parts.  He asked Ben "Do you lay eggs?" Not really and stay away from the tootsie rolls.

  By the time we returned to home I was very tired.  My guardian angels made me rest.  I hope to be able to participate in the Van Dorsten run in September.  http://combatcontrolnet.blogspot.com/2013/04/ssgt-luke-van-dorston-fundraiser.html

Heck I hope to attend the Lee County Relay for Life Friday

http://tinyurl.com/bslehpb

  I had a dream.  I was thinking "wouldn't it be cool if I could see the people who were praying for me?"...and then I did...like raindrops with a flash of the face...some familiar, some unknown.  Then I recognized I was in a body of water, first a pond, then a lake, then the ocean.  The thought flashed "wow, I am not sinking...I could drown."  Then I realized someone was holding my hand.  As I looked at Him a sense of calm fell over me and the blinding light of His presence woke me from my slumber.  Thank God and thank y'all for praying for me. 

Ronney and the cancer 4

Wednesday my mom and I went to the hospitals and I had a bunch of tests.  We started off in the heart hospital with an echo cardiogram.  It is like an ultrasound of your heart.  It was interesting to hear the sounds and see the pictures of my heart.  The technician moved the probe around to get good shots of the different chambers and valves in action.  The sensor also picked up the sounds.  Windshield wipers from one angle, installing a tin roof from another angle...
  We then had to travel about five miles across town.  So mom has a smart phone and I have a tom tom let us play with them.  The two devices gave conflicting information.  When they told me to turn toward Durham I raised the flag and went back to my point of departure and called a friend.  Three minutes later we were at the main hospital.  (I guess I did not activate the approach or maybe the OBS button was selected) Pilot geek joke. 
  The next test was a series of tests to establish a functional baseline of my swallowing.  They gave me a barium drink and took x-rays.  Barium applesauce, barium and crackers were also on the menu.  I really don't see the appeal...ha ha.  Barium has a relatively low toxicity and high density and shows up well in x-rays.  The infamous barium enema is used for GI tract imagery.  I am thankful that my cancer is not located in other places.  The speech pathologist said I have good functionality and advised me of some of the upcoming effects of treatment.  Chemo can make things taste and smell weird...the effect is generally short lived so keep on trying to eat.  A teaspoon of olive oil can be therapeutic.  After barium hors d'oeruvre a teaspoon of oil did not sound that bad.  One of the Louisiana cures for worms is a teaspoon of kerosene.  The joke goes...a preacher is illustrating the evils of alcohol and drops a worm in a bottle of booze...the worm dies and the preacher asks: "what have you learned?"  A drunk answers "I will never get worms."  bud dum bump.
  Next we went to draw blood.  They want to "get the numbers" I will learn more about that soon.  I contacted the young man who is involved in a study of cancer patients to make sure they got their blood at the same time.  The study is trying to collect information on 10,000 subjects.  Genetics, lifestyle, treatment protocols and other data points will be collected.  Big picture stuff that may help researchers find "cures" and raw data for their thesis.  Glad to help but I want to minimize the blood drawing episodes.  I HATE needles...actually the idea of needles.  My PJ brothers used to practice IV sticks and I would let them.  Since it is important my team is properly trained.  I provided a few young PJs with good feedback.  Like they missed the vein and stuff...  NVG sticks on a moving aircraft.  Love ya brother get good because when it comes down to it your skill at this may mean the difference between a teammate living. 
  Anyway since the CT scan required a period of fasting mom and I went to the Lineburger Comprehensive Cancer Center where we relaxed.  The center has many resources for the patient and caregiver.  A library, a kitchen, rooms to chill out, nutrition and other councilors.  One of the cool things is a color therapy spa.  http://www.suncoastspaequipment.com/spectracolor.cfm It is like a pod that you lay down in and it massages, vibrates and applies heat, music, different colored lights to help relax you.  My mom is very distressed since her child has cancer and she was refreshed after a short session in the pod.  At my mom's insistence I tried it.  It was great!  I put it on the C-130 vibration mode with a little MH-53 hot/cold therapy and went right to sleep.  Many of the resources in the center are donated including a section for wigs and hats.  It is not a factor in my treatment but I can imagine that the shock of losing your hair is distressing to many people. 
  The CT scan was now old hat since this is my third time.  They gave me the IV of the fluorescent paint and scanned me.  I will be interested to see the results and if limpoolio is growing, spreading or just dug in preparing for next weeks battle.  We gonna go on a ride in chair 36...
  We had a late lunch/early dinner at a cool restaurant in Chapel Hill.  Vimala's Curry blossom Cafe.  http://curryblossom.com/ Some of my friends and I ate a little and laughed a lot.  I am blessed in so many ways.