The illusion of control is important to humans. We love to pretend we are in charge of how our lives turn out. The facts don't matter. Preparation, hard work and talent do tend to sway the odds but fate, luck, and timing can take it all away or grant us magnificent opulence.
The one thing we can control is how we react. It is a constant battle that takes discipline. The space between our ears is the essence of our experience. Instead of proclaiming that “I am angry” turn it into a verb, “I am angering.” This subtle shift makes me take responsibility for the emotion rather than imagining that I am a leaf caught in a tide. Society in general shuns responsibility and glorifies the emotion itself. “Falling in love” like it is a mud puddle or “I am depressed” like it is a hole.
The challenge is to reflect on our internal dialogue, determine the source, and either strike at the root, or accept the mental and emotional state. “I am angering because I am hungry, tired, stressed or lonely. Then the choice becomes accept the anger and use it, or eat, and perhaps quell the emotion. Some of the deeper sources of emotional turmoil require profound changes. Poor diet and sleep habits are challenges that can be addressed with considerable effort. A lack of purpose is much more formidable. Nietzsche is one option. Since he went insane and committed suicide so I do not choose his philosophy.
Direct actions and habits to improve the quality of life include focusing on your diet: mental, physical and spiritual. “You are what you eat” is an axiom that applies. Slight changes add up. I try to drink water before my morning coffee. I love to eat! I often eat when I am bored, putting healthier choices in my way makes it more likely that I will eat fruits instead of chips. The stuff you put in your brain matters. Read and watch things that help feed your mind. Try to learn new stuff. Devoting 15 minutes a day to a new skill has helped me acquire many circus tricks. Silence is good for you. My mother meditates regularly. I tend to use monotonous tasks as an outlet to silence my big brain and allow me to engage in the flow of the universe. Running, walking, driving, motorcycle riding, surfing, weeding, mowing are examples of “boring” tasks that require various layers of concentration that can open the Zen of the moment. Subtle changes in the environment have been revolutionary in altering my mood. Opening the window shades, cleaning up clutter, a photo, and music can all shift the background influences in the positive direction.
